Style points

Ever thought:

I'd rather play 

A good match

Than play poorly 

And somehow win?

Because the opponent 

Played even worse?

Or to have caused the opponent 

To play even worse?

So 

What's a 

Good match

Then?

Not under-performed

Called upon what practiced

And what worked in practice

Played good points

Nothing bad happened

No injury

Played to win

Had fun?

If we still lost

The opponent was just better

At winning 

What gets counted :)

That day

Hopefully they played well too

And as a result

We "made a good match".

So even in officially 

Non-style competition

Apart from the Ws 

Of the world

It's OK to give ourselves 

"Style points" too

Make match more memorable.

Let's do it again

With style points

A loss is 

Not only a loss

A W a plus

How about a 2x2 between 

Winning and style?

Ever want 

Bad style? 

Obviously

In a match

We don't want to aim for

Style only

Show up 

Loosey-goosey

How about always bringing

The 3F?

P.S. Optional anecdote:

A couple of years ago

I played well 

At an ITF tournament 

Against a strong opponent

Before

I had lost 0 and 1

Didn't play horrible then 

But could have done better

The 2nd time

I played great

Almost every single point ended up being 

An entertaining rally

We had a few spectators

Who enjoyed it

Had a good time on court

Both of us

Somehow

I lost 1 and 0 :) 

Yes I'll keep thinking how to

Score better next time

But 

I didn't mind at all

It was a great match

Style points galore!

Friendly Fair Fierce

What's a good mindset when we compete?

For us?

Towards our opponent(s)?

For everyone around really?

For myself, I came to the conclusion to try and strive for

Friendly

Fair 

Fierce

The "competitive mindset triangle"?

If one is missing, we might have a problem.

If not on the day of,

maybe at the next meeting.

Have a little thought exercise:

Friendly and fair but not fierce?

Fair and fierce but not friendly?

Friendly and fierce but not fair?

If you have all 3, what's missing really?

Good thing is, we can practice like that too.

I.e. practice competition mindset in practice :)

So - could "3F" be the ideal competitive attitude?

Win some, lose some

Stepping back

What's a good 

Win/lose ratio 

For our development?

If we play up

We can learn much

If we play too far up though

It's not fun for anyone

In knockout format tournaments

Losing each first round 

Likely not enjoyable

Depressed lobster?

(It helps:

If there's consolation 

And with that 

At least 2 matches

2nd one likely not that far up 

Or 

Some group format

Where multiple matches 

Are guaranteed.)

In the other extreme

If we always win easy

We should probably pick 

A more challenging pond

If we're a favorite

We can practice living up to it

Make that its own challenge

Gracefully?

And/or 

Set additional goals

To keep us sharp 

Throughout the match

Losing as few games as possible

Or points within games

Or not needing 2nd serves

Missing min # of returns

View it as a prep 

For a strong opponent 

Who has a weaker backhand 

Or doesn't like rushing in

Of course 

Without going crazy 

Losing focus 

On the actual match

So maybe pick 

1 extra challenge

At a time

Downtime's optional!

Winning a whole thing 

Obviously comes with 

Its own challenges

Physically and mentally

Maybe that win

Will allow 

A step up 

For the next competition?

Generally

Winning is good for 

(Building back) confidence

When needed?

But winning everything 

Is not good for 

Dialing in confidence

Distorted picture

If I remember correctly

Rats are wired 

To let their weaker peers win 

~30% of the time

So fairness and empathy 

Seems baked into all creatures

Hopefully not eradicated by some 

And if so, bring-backable :)

When not in an official competition

With official rules

But especially if using competition 

To build up something

We can always give 

The objectively weaker party 

A leg up

3 serves?

Long term (i.e. lifetime)

A 50:50 win:lose

Would mean we've competed

At the right level in average

As long as we try to compete in 

Ever more challenging ponds

I.e. don't get stuck

I.e. keep developing

When we lose

Maybe mostly have that happen 

When there's 

Nothing to lose?

Nothing to lose

To compete or practice 

More freely

It helps when there's

Nothing to lose

When expectations are low

Stronger opponents

Tough circumstances

Odds against us

Sure

It'll be nice

To win 

Again

But 

If we compete up 

We can play up

There's less pressure

Ironically

Nothing to lose 

Might increase odds of

Winning :)

In any case

We owe

To at least compete 

To the best abilities

Opposite situation

When the favorite

Everything to lose

Different challenge

Ask folks 

Who made #1 

And tried 

To stay there

For a long term equilibrium

Maybe aim for 50:50

With a tendency to

Move up in ponds

For practice

There's less to lose

With precautions such as

Safety equipment

And 

There's less to lose

More freedom

When no one's watching